Journey, In viaggio col dolore

14. MY JOURNEY WITH PAIN. Genoa.Synchronicity.

When I arrived in Genoa at the beginning of 1999, I hardly spoke Italian. I was wrong with the auxiliaries of the verbs and the opening hours of the shops. I felt a little foreign at home.
At the end of February, to take stock of the situation and redo the Italian health card, I went to be visited in a well-known rheumatology center in Genoa. After a long medical history, the doctor asked me to undress and sit on the examination table. An endless time passed, and I was getting cold ...! She arrived with a bunch of medical apprentices showing me as a rare parrot, pointing out that I was a case of rheumatoid arthritis at a young age. They touched my hands, fingers, my right arm as if I had been an inanimate being. They didn't even ask me if they could get their hands on me, regardless of my sensitivity. Then she prescribed me medicines, telling me that I had to do much more useful things than acupuncture, with aggression and arrogance that I will remember as long as I am in the field.
I went out in tears. I felt humiliated and even a little desperate because, at that moment, everything seemed new to me. I didn't know what saint to vote for, also though I was in my hometown.
With my seriously ill dad and my elderly mom at home, there was no need to overload the situation with my problems. Since I was a child, I got used to not asking and getting by myself. 
Existence gave me what I needed.
Entering a downtown bar one morning, I found a couple of acquaintances, loyal fans behind the counter. I told in brief how I was. Beside me, a friend of theirs said that he could not but listen to me and that he knew an acupuncturist who might have been able to help me. He gave me his phone number.
I accepted this fact with great joy and confidence in life! Something inside me made me feel protected and cared for!
I called this new doctor. I challenged him, putting him in competition with the French acupuncturist. Still, he did not take up the provocation and proved respectful and 'holistic.' It made an excellent impression on me. 
I was not yet able to read the voice, but I felt I could trust him. And so I started an acupuncture cure with him, which lasted many and many years. In my opinion, he was a beautiful man, of a youthful appearance compared to the real age he had. I called him between me 'The Marlboro man' because he embodied that type of masculine, blue jeans and plaid shirt. He lived in the middle of nature, and he was also a worthy representative of Chinese medicine. He had a fire in his veins but tempered by joy, by a certain disarming innocence, and by a superfine intelligence. And, very rare, he was an exceptional researcher who studied tirelessly, keeping himself updated.
A few days later, I went to look for essential oil in a historic Genoese herbalist's shop. The owner, whom I had known for some time, told me about a doctor who practiced Dr. Kousmine's method to avoid eating gluten, milk, and its derivatives. This type of cure stabilized 80% of rheumatoid arthritis cases with a particular diet and homeopathic treatments. She gave me his contacts. Where was he? Close to Saint Tropez! And so I went back to Provence to start a period of treatment with this doctor.
Within a month, life had shown me my new treatments. In a still unconscious way, I was practicing a quality that, over time, I learned to recognize myself. I cry I despair, and then somehow I get up and proceed as if nothing had happened. At a deep level, there is a certainty and strength that make me stand up and reset what I have just experienced, even if painful.
Letting things come. Giving up the need to control is one of the great themes that I learned to contemplate daily, defying inner rigidity.
'Everything is determined by forces over which we have no control. It applies to the insect as well as to the stars. Humans, plants, or cosmic dust, we all dance to the rhythm of mysterious music, played in the distance by an invisible piper. ' Albert Einstein
'When I find myself in times of trouble      
Mother Mary comes to me 
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be. 
And in my hour of darkness 
She is standing right in front of me 
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
Let it be, let it be. 
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be. 
And when the broken hearted people 
Living in the world agree, 
There will be an answer, let it be. 
For though they may be parted there is 
Still a chance that they will see 
There will be an answer, let it be.
Let it be, let it be. Yeah 
There will be an answer, let it be. 
And when the night is cloudy, 
There is still a light that shines on me, 
Shine on until tomorrow, let it be. 
I wake up to the sound of music 
Mother Mary comes to me 
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
Let it be, let it be. 
There will be an answer, let it be. 
Let it be, let it be, 
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.'
Lennon-Mc Cartney